Create Space for Aspiring Authors
Thanks to Create Space, Amazon’s self-publishing platform, I finally am an author, a published writer, can you believe it? Or something like that. As everybody who knows me knows, I toiled in the underground for decades, but I just couldn’t seem to swing any significant move. Of course I very well knew that cracking the publishing world had always been hard as it still is now, which is why for a very long time, I just quit trying to write.
I had had around a hundred “poems,” a dozen short stories, countless ramblings which I called essays and one one-act play by the time I decided it was all too pointless to keep the hustle going. It was for a really long time. At first I felt some resentment too at not being able to make it, but as with most everything else, time has deadened that feeling so thoroughly that now I don’t actually feel anything about it anymore. I could even laugh hard at that silly period in my life now.
Still, the desire to write is not totally extinguished. It has always been there. What’s gone is that megalomaniac desire I had for “fame” and “money” as if I had not known that it was extremely hard to have either especially given the kind of writer that I was.
Now, I write more for myself, more as an exercise for my mind, and maybe also to give in to this sometimes unappeasable compulsion in me to have my voice heard, my story told. I have lost the pretensions that I could hit the big time and earn millions, that’s for sure. I don’t expect to earn even a single penny from my writing endeavors. It is just for the sheer pleasure of writing what’s on my mind. If anything fortunate happens at all, great but I totally have no issues with “nothing” now.
Comes Create Space. Unlike most self-publishing companies, Create Space provides writers the chance at seeing their writings published in various forms totally free. I mean who wouldn’t get excited at the prospect of seeing your story or stories with a proper book format, book title and all? And you even get the chance to have it made available for Kindle users. Your book and your name, if you want to, will technically come up on search engines! Fucking exciting, isn’t it?
And then you start getting fired up about writing again. I still don’t allow myself though to get that excited to think that it is going to make me into another J.K. Rowling or Suzanne Collins. I know myself too much, of course. I just don’t have their talent, period. But it just makes me feel sort of optimistic knowing that there now is such an option. The possibility, however slim, now feels real, not too much like a shot to the moon.
Not that I’m gonna fall for that trap again, but for some reason, it has given me that nudge to return to form, sort of. To return to that habit of reading, reflecting and actually articulating my thoughts in writing.
Written a couple of years ago. I did try the service which gave me three professional looking proofs. Pulled them out when I realized that, nah, my writing was still not up to snuff. But for those more talented people out there, you might want to give the service a try.